0

Just fear me, love me, do as I say, and I will be your slave…

I went to a rooftop cinema to see Labyrinth last night. I enjoyed it. Though it was my elleventy-upteenth viewing of the film it was actually my first on the big screen.

In a movie so packed with detail it makes a big difference, some of the little goings on in the background are gold. (Speaking of packed, David Bowie’s crotch elicited quite a crowd reaction…)

I’ve loved the movie for years. I was nine when I first saw it and had an instant crush on Jennifer Connelly that continues to this day. I sat through the Rocketeer for that woman! (Little did I know that years later her ‘ass-to-ass sequence’ in Requiem for a Dream would do irrepairable damage to my fragile mind.) My crush on David Bowie took a little while longer to gestate but has been none the less enduring..

It never ceases to amaze me how many great people pop up in the credits. Bowie, Henson, ex-python Terry Jones, Brian Froud, juggler Michael Moschen, Danny John-Jules (of Red Dwarf) the list goes on. I’m also a big fan of Ron Mueck’s subsequent work. I had the privilege of viewing some of his staggering work at the Saatchi gallery in London a few years ago and haven’t forgotten it.

Anyway, they don’t make ‘em like that anymore. Labyrinth is one of the Enduring Six – Labyrinth, Dark Crystal, Willow, Princess Bride and the Star Wars trilogy – repeated viewings of which and interminable quotings from took up the bulk of my childhood and early teen years. Come to think of it for a no-necked American hack George Lucas has had quite an impact on my life. Ours has always been a rocky relationship however, and though I can accept Howard the Duck as a unfortunate accident, some things – like Episode 1 – are unforgivable.

Did anyone else out there have the good fortune to play the Commodore 64 game version of Labyrinth? An early offering from Lucasarts, a company who for a while there, could do no wrong in my eyes. (I won’t start talking about Monkey Island at this juncture or the post will never end.)

Sorry. This is my first blog and urge to scatter parenthetical comments like rice at a wedding is powerful strong.

I will try to resist. A friend suggested I might like to adopt a choose-your-own-adventure style. “To to continue the explanation of how the author learned all he needed to know about Buddhism from watching “Monkey” turn to page 9, or to hear him rant about Asterix comics and what they tell us about 1st Century BC turn to page 13…)

One of my favourite things about the game was that it started out in a traditional text-based adventure style, which I loved in itself, (“GO EAST,” “TAKE POPCORN”. I remember “go DINNER” resulted in a memorable passage with the protagonist’s cheeks squelching against mashed potato and gravy…) and only broke out the cutting edge 1986 graphics when you started watching the film in the local cinema.
The game play itself was quite engaging, and though I never managed to finish it – always got stuck at the goblin palace – it still gave me a strong sense of achievement to get as far as I did. Plus, it added the word ‘adumbrate’ to my 10 year old vocabulary. So what’s not to love?

Ok. Last night’s outing provided a much needed distraction from my gaming withdrawal and so for I am still on the wagon. I have been getting more sleep the last few days and I’m even thinking about trying out this Bye Bye Browser to get me off to dreamland at a resonable time.

I’ll keep you all posted.

(Photo taken with my new Nokia N73 mobile-phone.)

0

Withdrawal

“You play through the tears, the aching wrist, the hunger, after a while
it all goes away.
All of it except the game I should say.”

-From ‘Virus” By Neil Gaiman

I am an addict. I admit it. But with your help I can overcome this terrible affliction.

Enough is enough. Two many times have I found myself still in front of my screen at the wrong end of five am. Sure, sometimes I’m up circumnavigating the web trawling for wonders – but more likely I’m hunched over some goddamn computer game.

Anyone who has clocked up same serious game time knows what I’m talking about. Bleary eyed, teeth grinding, just-until-I-get-through-this-bit, tunnel visioned obsession. The kind of session that ends with you standing up to finally slink off to bed, only to discover you can barely walk due to sitting in the same position for thirteen hours.

I’ve been there oh so many times. So I have made a bloody minded new years resolution to give up computer games. Indefinitely.

Perhaps I’m overly optimistic in thinking I might gain an extra thirty or so hours a week and use this new found surplus of time to write a novel, learn to play the piano or finally do my last three year’s tax returns. But I think it can’t help have a positive effect. Time will tell.

And you, dear reader, are invited to join me as I try to resist the insidious siren song of my software and stay the hell away from gaming.

Also, I’ll probably talk about computer games a lot. In the same was as if I were starving in the desert I might choose to pass the time describing to you my favourite recipe for oven baked Cajun-style king fish fillets.

So. Last night I uninstalled all the games from Friday (my beloved PC), and went to bed early.

Then I played some all New Mario Bros on my girlfriend’s DS Lite.

Which is manifestly NOT cheating. Consider it like a methadone program. Am I supposed to come off the hard stuff cold turkey? Jesus.

Anyway, what’s a little hand-held 2D platforming next to Oblivion? (Never has a game been so aptly named, but we can talk about that another day…)

So the challenge has been made. The gauntlet has been thrown down. (Oooh! I used to play Gauntlet with my brother on the Commodore 64 for hours on end. I was the green elf-guy with all the arrows! My god when you accidentally used your key and let out that death-guy who could drain all of your life and was almost impossible to kill…)

*deep breath*

Wish me luck.